Thu, Nov 20, 1980
Segment 1: Promo: Shakespeare in the Park;
Norman has problems with the set, and a punk in the audience.
Segment 2: Cheryl Kinsey, Traveling Sexologist; Cheryl, on a surprise house call, helps out some newlyweds with technique.
Segment 3: Kanadian Korner 19: Boom Shadows, Stuff that Bugs Us; They show the boom microphone and boom shadows. They give up on their other topic.
Segment 4: Promo: The Merv Griffin Show: Arafat, Liberace, Ferigno; Coat linings, terrorism, Merv does a number with Liberace, Loni's breasts, Hulk's makeup.
Segment 5: Message from Guy: Viewer Mail; Guy reads some letters, promotes some souvenir coins.
Segment 6: PSA: Participation; Come on Canada, it's time to get active [Note: Participation was a Canadian government program to encourage Canadians to exercise more.]
Segment 7: Promo: Flashing Eyes; Chuck grills a marathon runner and takes another shot at Gerry Brown; Mandoza comes back as a marathon swimmer. [Notes: Theme music by ELP; this show is a sequel to 4th Degree from episode 2x12.]
Segment 8: Mel's Rock Pile: Speed of Light; Mel looks at the top ten, talks to some of the kids (the Bloughs, all unrelated), while Speed of Light backs out of their gig. [Note: Mel has perfected his classic dance stance, the classic theme and set.]
Segment 2: Cheryl Kinsey, Traveling Sexologist; Cheryl, on a surprise house call, helps out some newlyweds with technique.
Segment 3: Kanadian Korner 19: Boom Shadows, Stuff that Bugs Us; They show the boom microphone and boom shadows. They give up on their other topic.
Segment 4: Promo: The Merv Griffin Show: Arafat, Liberace, Ferigno; Coat linings, terrorism, Merv does a number with Liberace, Loni's breasts, Hulk's makeup.
Segment 5: Message from Guy: Viewer Mail; Guy reads some letters, promotes some souvenir coins.
Segment 6: PSA: Participation; Come on Canada, it's time to get active [Note: Participation was a Canadian government program to encourage Canadians to exercise more.]
Segment 7: Promo: Flashing Eyes; Chuck grills a marathon runner and takes another shot at Gerry Brown; Mandoza comes back as a marathon swimmer. [Notes: Theme music by ELP; this show is a sequel to 4th Degree from episode 2x12.]
Segment 8: Mel's Rock Pile: Speed of Light; Mel looks at the top ten, talks to some of the kids (the Bloughs, all unrelated), while Speed of Light backs out of their gig. [Note: Mel has perfected his classic dance stance, the classic theme and set.]
Thu, Jan 15, 1981
Segment 1: Commercial: Gordon Lightfoot Sings Every Song Ever Written;
'Supercalifragilisticexpialidotious,' 'Happy Birthday,' 'Good King Wenceslas,' '76 Trombones' and more, from K-Tel. Record $4.99, tape or cassette $6.99.
Segment 2: Cooking with Marcello: Vatican; Live, via the SCTV satellite, Marcello visits the Vatican and waits to tour the kitchens. He pinches the wrong girl and buys a souvenir picture of the pope. The pope gets kidnapped.
Segment 3: Kanadian Korner 18: Sports; Hockey was better when there were only 6 teams. Now it's too hard to carry around your cards. And why is Monday Night Football on Thursday?
Segment 4: Crazy Crafts: Bob; Molly has a bit of a hangover. She introduces Bob, who she met last night, and tries to figure out what she made the night before.
Segment 5: Message from Guy: Alpha Channel; Guy introduces Alpha Channel, and explains why he uses a wheelchair: "for respect."
Segment 6: Promo: Alpha Channel; The exclusive Alpha Channel goes behind the scenes to show Neil Simon working on a script, Jane Fonda's latest movie, Woody Allen's movie and Alan Alda talking to his agent.
Segment 7: Bill Needle's Mailbag 8; The show length is cut in half again, to seven and a half seconds.
Segment 8: Dialing for Dollars: Partridge Family Goes to Mars; The jackpot is 10 dollars. Walter gets a threatening phone call.
Segment 2: Cooking with Marcello: Vatican; Live, via the SCTV satellite, Marcello visits the Vatican and waits to tour the kitchens. He pinches the wrong girl and buys a souvenir picture of the pope. The pope gets kidnapped.
Segment 3: Kanadian Korner 18: Sports; Hockey was better when there were only 6 teams. Now it's too hard to carry around your cards. And why is Monday Night Football on Thursday?
Segment 4: Crazy Crafts: Bob; Molly has a bit of a hangover. She introduces Bob, who she met last night, and tries to figure out what she made the night before.
Segment 5: Message from Guy: Alpha Channel; Guy introduces Alpha Channel, and explains why he uses a wheelchair: "for respect."
Segment 6: Promo: Alpha Channel; The exclusive Alpha Channel goes behind the scenes to show Neil Simon working on a script, Jane Fonda's latest movie, Woody Allen's movie and Alan Alda talking to his agent.
Segment 7: Bill Needle's Mailbag 8; The show length is cut in half again, to seven and a half seconds.
Segment 8: Dialing for Dollars: Partridge Family Goes to Mars; The jackpot is 10 dollars. Walter gets a threatening phone call.
Fri, Sep 22, 1978
Segment 1: Promo: Monster chiller Horror Theatre: The House of Cats;
Count Floyd shows Some clips from the three-dimensional semi-classic. Floyd is selling the 3D glasses for 27 bucks.
Segment 2: Clip: Dr. Tongue's 3D House of Cats; Dr. Tongue transforms women into cats. (The 3D technique is not quite perfected at this point.)
Segment 3: SCTV Sports Central: Desert Classic; Coverage of the Bob Hope Desert Classic begins with some background on Bob's golf career.
Segment 4: Commercial: Delay; Have your headache when you want it.
Segment 5: Betty Bain: Professional Juror; Betty takes jury duty seriously, sacrificing her family life.
Segment 6: Promo: Masterpiece Theatre: Naughty Chambermaids; Alistair's introduction is interrupted by a walk on by Bob Hope plugging his special.
Segment 7: Bob Hope Desert Classic; Bob and Lou host this star-studded golfing event. Begin has a bad lie, and argues with Arafat. King Fahud shows Lola how to hold her putter. Charlton Heston helps Golda chip through a pipeline. Arafat occupies the 12th hole, while Begin takes the 13th fairway. Lou gets lost off the 18th hole.
Segment 2: Clip: Dr. Tongue's 3D House of Cats; Dr. Tongue transforms women into cats. (The 3D technique is not quite perfected at this point.)
Segment 3: SCTV Sports Central: Desert Classic; Coverage of the Bob Hope Desert Classic begins with some background on Bob's golf career.
Segment 4: Commercial: Delay; Have your headache when you want it.
Segment 5: Betty Bain: Professional Juror; Betty takes jury duty seriously, sacrificing her family life.
Segment 6: Promo: Masterpiece Theatre: Naughty Chambermaids; Alistair's introduction is interrupted by a walk on by Bob Hope plugging his special.
Segment 7: Bob Hope Desert Classic; Bob and Lou host this star-studded golfing event. Begin has a bad lie, and argues with Arafat. King Fahud shows Lola how to hold her putter. Charlton Heston helps Golda chip through a pipeline. Arafat occupies the 12th hole, while Begin takes the 13th fairway. Lou gets lost off the 18th hole.
Thu, Jan 1, 1981
Segment 1: Got a Minute with Dr. Sid Dithers;
Dr. Sid eventually gets around to discussing stress.
Segment 2: Kanadian Korner 28: Mystery Guest; Doug has earmuffs over his eyes. They play name that beer.
Segment 3: Promo: Taxi Driver with Bob Hope; Bob Hope is looking at you this season on SCTV.
Segment 4: Message From Guy: The New Year; Guy reflects on the new year and what it might be like in 1984...and then passes out.
Segment 5: Message From Prickley: The New Year; Prickley is in Guy's chair reflecting on the new year and 1984.
Segment 6: SCTV New Year's Eve Party; Bobby interviews some station personalities as the countdown to 1984 begins.
Segment 7: Stand By / Telescreen Bumper / Time and Weather; Stand By..."This is Telescreen. Do not adjust. It is a crime to adjust Telescreen."
(At this point, everything is a parody of the George Orwell book '1984', with Orson Welles appearing in still images as Big Brother).
Segment 8: Komrade Kangaroo; Komrade Kangaroo makes a megaphone and uses it to eavesdrop on mommy and daddy. He then notifies Mr. Screen. Next week: Bunny Rabbit will be vaporized and stuffed to make decorations for hate week.
Segment 9: Promo: Hanging at 22:00 hours / Telescreen Bumper
Segment 10: Comrade Allen; An exercise show where Comrade Allen concentrates on touching toes.
Segment 11: Promo: Doublethink Game Show; Contestants vie for razor blades and shoe laces trying to guess whether the chocolate ration went up or down.
Segment 12: The Praise Big Brother Show; Religious talk show with Jim Bakker as host. Charlton Heston does a walk-on to the show. Before they start talking, the lights go down, and Heston announces that resistance fighters are attacking the Ministry of Love. The caption 'Thoughtcrime' appears as Heston denounces Big Brother and the Party of Oceana.
Segment 13: Message From Prickley: The New Year; Prickley wakes up from her dream and its the normal new year of 1984 without Big Brother.
Segment 14: Message From Guy: The New Year; Guy wakes up and wraps up the show.
Segment 2: Kanadian Korner 28: Mystery Guest; Doug has earmuffs over his eyes. They play name that beer.
Segment 3: Promo: Taxi Driver with Bob Hope; Bob Hope is looking at you this season on SCTV.
Segment 4: Message From Guy: The New Year; Guy reflects on the new year and what it might be like in 1984...and then passes out.
Segment 5: Message From Prickley: The New Year; Prickley is in Guy's chair reflecting on the new year and 1984.
Segment 6: SCTV New Year's Eve Party; Bobby interviews some station personalities as the countdown to 1984 begins.
Segment 7: Stand By / Telescreen Bumper / Time and Weather; Stand By..."This is Telescreen. Do not adjust. It is a crime to adjust Telescreen."
(At this point, everything is a parody of the George Orwell book '1984', with Orson Welles appearing in still images as Big Brother).
Segment 8: Komrade Kangaroo; Komrade Kangaroo makes a megaphone and uses it to eavesdrop on mommy and daddy. He then notifies Mr. Screen. Next week: Bunny Rabbit will be vaporized and stuffed to make decorations for hate week.
Segment 9: Promo: Hanging at 22:00 hours / Telescreen Bumper
Segment 10: Comrade Allen; An exercise show where Comrade Allen concentrates on touching toes.
Segment 11: Promo: Doublethink Game Show; Contestants vie for razor blades and shoe laces trying to guess whether the chocolate ration went up or down.
Segment 12: The Praise Big Brother Show; Religious talk show with Jim Bakker as host. Charlton Heston does a walk-on to the show. Before they start talking, the lights go down, and Heston announces that resistance fighters are attacking the Ministry of Love. The caption 'Thoughtcrime' appears as Heston denounces Big Brother and the Party of Oceana.
Segment 13: Message From Prickley: The New Year; Prickley wakes up from her dream and its the normal new year of 1984 without Big Brother.
Segment 14: Message From Guy: The New Year; Guy wakes up and wraps up the show.
Thu, Sep 18, 1980
Segment 1: Message from Prickley: Rock Concert;
Edith welcomes us to another fine year at SCTV. She introduces herself ("I replaced that schmo Moe Green"), and invites us to stay tuned.
Segment 2: Promo: Rhoda; Rhoda's running a clinic, and she's lost weight.
Segment 3: Promo: My Fair Lady; The Professor finds Perini a touch nut to crack. They sing the "Rain in Spain" bit.
Segment 4: Teaser: SCTV News
Segment 5: Kanadian Korner 1: Introductory Show; Bob and Doug McKenzie announce that they had to change the name to Great White North for legal reasons. They have new boots.
Segment 6: SCTV News: Earl's funblemouth; Togo blames quake on the CIA. Earl has trouble delivering his items.
Segment 7: Promo: My Life: One More Time; Woody finds someone he can relate to.
Segment 8: Lee A. Iacocca's Rock Concert; Lee asks for 1.5 billion dollars in government assistance and encourages viewers to harass their congressmen. He then complains about government regulations. He introduces Ringo's new band Rings ("Cause I know That You'll Always be True"). Lee offers a five dollar rebate and her personal guarantee to every viewer, and introduces Gino Vinelli ("Stop"). Lee introduces his daughter Imogena and also introduces Slim and Barbra ("You Don't Bring Me Flowers"). Lee once more urges viewers to write the government, then introduces George Carlin. Finally, Lee introduces Tony Orlando and sings a duet with him ("Tie a Yellow Ribbon 'Round a Dodge Omni"). Lee makes a final pitch.
Segment 2: Promo: Rhoda; Rhoda's running a clinic, and she's lost weight.
Segment 3: Promo: My Fair Lady; The Professor finds Perini a touch nut to crack. They sing the "Rain in Spain" bit.
Segment 4: Teaser: SCTV News
Segment 5: Kanadian Korner 1: Introductory Show; Bob and Doug McKenzie announce that they had to change the name to Great White North for legal reasons. They have new boots.
Segment 6: SCTV News: Earl's funblemouth; Togo blames quake on the CIA. Earl has trouble delivering his items.
Segment 7: Promo: My Life: One More Time; Woody finds someone he can relate to.
Segment 8: Lee A. Iacocca's Rock Concert; Lee asks for 1.5 billion dollars in government assistance and encourages viewers to harass their congressmen. He then complains about government regulations. He introduces Ringo's new band Rings ("Cause I know That You'll Always be True"). Lee offers a five dollar rebate and her personal guarantee to every viewer, and introduces Gino Vinelli ("Stop"). Lee introduces his daughter Imogena and also introduces Slim and Barbra ("You Don't Bring Me Flowers"). Lee once more urges viewers to write the government, then introduces George Carlin. Finally, Lee introduces Tony Orlando and sings a duet with him ("Tie a Yellow Ribbon 'Round a Dodge Omni"). Lee makes a final pitch.
Thu, Sep 25, 1980
Segment 1: Message from Guy: Thursday Night Guy complains about the plant in his office, and introduces SCTV's new hip, relevant comedy show. Segment 2: Announcement: Little House Across the Mersey Segment 3: Thursday Night Live Live from Edmonton, it's Thursday Night, SCTV's new hip, relevant comedy show, hosted by Earl Camembert. With lots of whooping and hollering, drug references and bad language. A parody of "Saturday Night Live" and "Fridays". Segment 4: Kanadian Korner 2: Doug's got his earmuffs on Doug misses the start of the show because his earmuffs are on. [Great White North] Segment 5: Promo: Dat's Da Name of Dat Tune Funky contestants name funky tunes. Segment 6: Promo: Bittman Does Dallas Bobby sings ("Abelline"), gives a stirring speech ("Remember the Alamo!"), and dances with the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders. "How are y'all!" Segment 7: K-Tel's Fast-Talking Playhouse: Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? Harvey K-Tel presents a 2 minute version of the classic play. They finish early. Segment 8: Promo: Guy Friday Guy works for one of the most powerful women in business today. He's the man behind the woman. (Note: Guy flies Great White North Airline) Segment 9: Commercial: Half Legs For the woman in you. Segment 10: Point/Counterpoint: Alcoholism Cronkite and Brinkley discuss alcoholism. Walter runs a film of a Saturn 4 taking off.